Once, my sister-in-law and I was chatting about the offerings to the dead, comparing the chinese religion (burning incense, offering food etc) versus that of Catholic, only offering candles. She said that Catholic ‘ghosts’ can only eat candles while that of the Chinese ghosts can eat so much of the other food…

The question about life after death was my question to my mother. I told her that next time if I died, I would come back to tell her about life after death. Then I thought, if I had died, how can I come back to tell my mother? My mother just laughed at my silliness….

Can you imagine, I was ‘dead’ and now I ’survived’. I was ‘resurrected’ on the third day and having died for 4 days! I don’t know how the Chinese and English calendar works, no idea at all, not my expertise. I only follows the English calendar. I always don’t remember my chinese date of birth. My mother told me several times, she can remember all. It is how miraculous even my chinese date of birth! I was born during one of the days of the Chinese Ghost Festival, and it was four days…. this is really awesome! HOLY HOLY HOLY GOD! What the bible says is all the truth! There is only ONE GOD in this world and to be saved, JESUS is the only saviour of the world!

This is my lunch. This fish is very fresh. My mother gave me four fish. I fried them and ate them with plain porridge. It is so good to eat FRESH fish. This Botak Jones seemed not happy over what I said about their freshness of their fish. They think that I never eat fresh fish before. I had been eating fish and seafood since young! My father used to catch fish. We used to go seaside to catch fish and to catch frogs! What sort of fish I never eat before? My father caught catfish, which we always threw away. They were considered ‘lousy fish’, but restaurant served catfish, and they were expensive!

Once, many many years back, my first dish of catfish at Swenson. It was so smelly! It was totally not fresh, and they changed another one for me. I sent email to Botak Jones, since ’she’ wanted me to do so. But I am not going to reply back, if they do not trust my opinion, still saying about their fish………….

Yes, some fish have ‘reddish’ meat or flesh, but the taste and the smell, WE CAN TELL. Not all people can tell. IF you have tasted the best, would you NOT KNOW the inferior? Anyway, I am not going to argue with them. This is their business. And I am not asking for the moon over that amount of money we spent there. ‘She’ also mentioned I love to write! That is another courtesy way of stating that I write too much, and had mentioned too much about them… whatever it is, I am not the only customer they have.

19th April 2008, Ricsson had a severe headache and we went to KK Women and Children’s Hospital. It was all brand new renovation at the hospital and this little seahorse reminded me of my past…

My father caught a few seahorse last time. The biggest one was a yellow seahorse. All the seahorse that we caught, I dried them and brought them to the Chinese Traditional Medical Hall to sell to the owner (for a few dollars only). The yellow one was the prettiest and biggest of all….

This is so funny. When the living knows that they are going to be dead, they always wish to eat their favourite food. They always want to eat full full before they ‘go’. And it is so funny that I am always hungry…. always like a hungry ghost, always feeling hungry…. (candles cannot fill the stomach really : )) )

Childhood time is really the best, having no worries about food — always have seafood to eat, tonic food to drink and fresh fruits to eat……

My father was never faithful to my mother. As with other normal couples, they quarrel badly, suicide, etc. But until now, they are still married. They mentioned divorce everytime when my father had affair, but now I am glad they are still married….

His parents divorced now. His father had numerous affairs as well. Similar plight to my family. Taking knife, wanted to kill the mother, and cheating the wife (the mother) of something else. Even their divorce was kept secret. They did not let the children know anything. Everything ’secretive’.

Cooked these for lunch on 4th August 2008:

Prawns with tomato sauce — My mother gave me all these food. I don’t have to go marketing. It saved so much.

This fish is very fresh and they have natural ’sweetness’. I love to eat home cooked food…. I can eat just plain porridge with century eggs, but nobody would want to eat that…

Fried Bayam : But it is so difficult to cook for the family…. everybody got different preference… The big Man always said that the food served at Tengah Airbase is not fit for human consumption. My mother cooked good food, I fried fresh fish and nobody likes…

It’s a sword stabbed right into my heart, a sharp sword. He is cleaning the air con now (after Clara asked why I cried….and he heard… but I never asked him to clean already, I did not talk to him….), after the aircon serviceman had left (NYT AIR CON SERVICES). It was ‘cheating’, it was in the end not serviced….. How much sorrows in my heart. How much energy consumption going to be wasted if the air-con is not functioning properly as well. But he don’t care. He don’t care of anything at all! But only care about his own PLEASURE and LEISURE. GUYS how good it is to be a MAN. I always wanted to be a MAN, it is good to be a MAN. How many times have a woman been looked down upon and ‘disregarded’ when opinions are voiced, even in public!

I was looking for seats at IKEA Tampines. He was standing at a spot, leaving everything for me to do as always. Then only using his mouth to do the work…. The children and me walked around looking for seats. A few guys and especially one, with a pram, ’snatched’ my seats. Nevermind, I told him. Guys, MEN speak louder than GALS, we are but the WEAKER SEX, come come and bully us, come and abuse us, come and cheat us!

He said,”Today Google depends on you!” Ha ha, how much do I earn per day? Do I regard MONEY AS MY LIFE? HALLO, if I wanted money, I could have continue working outside, and disregard the family. WOULD this house still exist, this family still exist if I had not sacrificed and if I had not eat the humble pie? FOR WHAT I am doing all these? OPEN YOUR EYES, you would never see, MAN, how your wife feels behind you, every single MAN who is cheating behind the wife (so many so many, I even feel ‘disgusted’ chatting with such man).

I planned to write about my cooking, which is nothing much, but this is really what happened while I was writing… how often do I blog, how often do I surf the computer, how much time do I have in a day, do I only surf the computer, do I only ‘worship the computer’? Ask yourself, MAN with multiple faces….

written 5 August 2008

It is how amazing the spirit works. All the things that happen and happened are all but God’s work, the original creator. It is really amazing how I manage to be saved, otherwise, when I would not have a chance of eternal life, I would be one of the ‘devil’. It is how scary it would be, and how scary to be even ‘alone’ in the ‘other world’ alone and with the ‘devil’ like what the show is (Voice)…

If I had not experienced what I had experienced, I would not have believed, and I would not have so much to say about this show. It would be just another ‘normal’ show, whereby I would say at the end of the show, ‘nice show’ or ‘lousy show’. But lots of things and lots of things to say about this show. It’s not about the the productions etc, but the story line, main gist of the show, the content…

Young-eon (Kim Ok-bin) died in this Korean all-girls’ school and her spirit was trapped in this building…..

So many things happened that month (March). In just three days, but it seems to me like one week. I went to Temasek Clinic, I went Woodlands North Plaza, and I knew all that I did. My husband said I was crazy, but I knew what I did. Nobody understand, but I knew what had happened… Just like this show, very similar, but that was not me. Things are not the same like that, but it is ’similar’ logic.

The spirit or ghost could not leave the building, the place where it had died. The spirit was trapped in the building. Similarly, the other spirit, the first death (Heui-yeong (Kim Seo-hyeong)) of the building.

Young-eon (Kim Ok-bin) standing, in front of her, her visioned changed…

My mother used to say that the spirit can ‘deceive’ the eyes. This is how ‘optical illusion’ can play tricks on the eyes… In the same building, you are ‘entrapped’ repeating round and round the ‘bush’ cannot escape from the place… I experienced similar experience. I thought my family is going to die and rot in my house for 40 years!

At that time, I was ‘fooled’. I thought I was ‘played’ and ‘fooled’ by my enemies. I thought there were some kind of sorcerers. I went to kiss Jesus’ feet for some time, behaving like an idiot. I thought I must die to save my family, otherwise we had to stay in the desert for 40 years, no food and no water….

Richard said I was crazy. He wanted to eat Chicken Rice. He said he was hungry. He said,”Crazy, you said ‘don’t need to eat, God give you manna’.” Yes, that was what I thought. Lying on the bed, it was so strange, how time shifted….

I was still thinking of ‘to believe or not to believe’ and then when ‘God came’, the flashes of light came, I was scared to death. I thought I was so brave, but when the time come, I was a ‘coward’, real coward who fear death. I did not sacrifice my life after all. The sound, all the sound I heard, the chain sound (sound of the chain) that came to my room, was so scary. There was no time to think of ‘believe or not to believe anymore’. I just clenched my fist, hold my hands together and pray for “Jesus please help me, Jesus please protect me

Young-eon (Kim Ok-bin) standing behind her best friend, Sun-Min

On the first day of death, the spirit did not know that it was dead. My mother also told me that. They only knew their death later. Only people who know them best, the closest friend can hear the voice of the dead… In this case, Sun-Min, the one standing in front, can hear her voice (Young-eon), standing behind her. Nobody can see her at all, but only Sun-Min and another ‘psychic’ girl can hear her voice.

The ending was very mind ‘invoking’, very ‘happening’, is something to do with the evil spirits and the truth. That is how Satan can fool people and how people can ‘perish’ their life.

On the night, where ‘God came’, all the ‘angels and saints’ came. My father once had similar experience. He told me about it. It was ‘a group’ he said. The head of all was Saint Paul, and that is why I heard the chains sound, very loud and clear…

In the show, the other weird woman, this one above, she has also the ability to hear voices of the dead since childhood. She could hear the voice of Young-eon, but refused to help her.

This show is really about the good and the evil, people and spirits, all living in one community. You do not know which is speaking the truth, but Jesus said,”I know My sheep and My sheep know Me.”

Last night, at Veron’s house, I learned many things. It is through People, which is really Instrument of God, that we will see and ‘hear’ and hear what God trying to tell us…… and this is a Special Gift from God To Me, from Jesus, My Friend.

Richard’s ‘Berry’, RSAF Beret Cap

This is Beret Cap. I asked Richard what is this ‘hat’ called? He answered,”berry”. I asked him,”How do you spell that?” That was his answer, ‘Berry”

I was so happy to wear the ‘berry’. This is not the first time I wear the berry. But just now, as I was posting about Tengah Airbase, and as I learned for the first time, the motto of Tengah Airbase, and its little history, I was so amazed and happy, proud to wear the ‘berry’.

This is written inside the ‘berry’. The correct word is ‘beret cap’ I suppose. I like the material. It is so furry — so it is made of all wool! It has the logo of Merlion Head on it. How proud it must be to wear the beret!

After Republic Singapore Airforce, now it is time to talk about Republic Polytechnic.

Reflection Pond, Republic Polytechnic: officially Opened by Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong on 31 July 2007

For a few days, almost one week, I did not post anything. But today(30th July 2008), I continued. This afternoon, went to Republic Polytechnic for lunch. It was the new building, the arts and cultural centre which attracted me. There was nothing special going on there.

This is not the first time I went there. At first we wanted to go Marsiling to eat Bak Kut Teh, but later, I saw the Arts and Cultural Building (never went there before), and decided to go there to take a look. At the polytechnic, walking around, I was not interested in taking any photographs….nothing special already (since it is not the first time or second time or third time I went there). However, there are some difference ever since the last time I went there. I was still happy to go there for lunch.

This is one year since he the official opening. I got the fact sheet for the first time… Republic Polytechnic is Singapore’s fifth post-secondary educational institution. It was established on 1 August 2002 and commenced its operations from July 2003. The campus is located at Woodlands Ave 9. It strives to be the educational, cultural and technological hub of the north, vibrant campus that is friendly and welcoming to students, staff, visitors, industry partners and the community at large. One attraction of Republic Polytechnic is their special Admiralty Park. It is beautiful.

The new generation of pupils are so lucky now. They can have so many choices of programmes to study, unlike my time… The next attractive feature of Republic Polytechnic 共和理工学院 is their unique facilities:

• Wireless Learning Hub - It is a campus with a central nucleus containing 11 identical learning Pods *8-9-storys high) and one staff administration hub.
• Adventure Learning Centre
• Republic Cultural Centre

For more information: Republic Polytechnic

The time is now 12.48am 31 July 2008 when I had finished writing this post, and I have to end my day here…

Friends asked me,”Do you know that Jesus can heal people?” Some asked,”Christian got celebrate Dumpling Festivals and Lantern Festivals one meh?” Still some more said,”Do you know that Christian says Jesus will come again?” My tuition kid told me about Armageddon. What kind of Christian am I? I don’t know anything! It was such a ‘disgrace’. Do I call myself Christian, Catholic, BORN CATHOLIC, but don’t know anything about being a catholic and don’t know anything about what I am doing at all!

The first official place of work, Mount Elizabeth Hospital. The people I worked with, the names of the people I knew, and NOW, it was very clear. Names are HOLY, ALL is destined. Many things I had seen. The kind of people I came across and worked with… Over there, I met ‘the real Catholic’, at least more ‘real’ than me. What a ‘disgrace’, a real disgrace, and I did not even know how to talk so fluently and ‘naturally’ like them…

A Laughing Stock
Yes, the family is ‘broken’, all the ‘bonds’ and ‘links’ weakened year after year. What kind of Christian and what kind of Catholic are we? The family placed the statues of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. They buy altar, they buy flowers, they buy gold even for the ’statues’ to wear. But they hardly go to church, and they NEVER go to church now.

Laugh, MOCK, LAUGH ALL YOU CAN
I am a UNIVERSITY GRADUATE, ‘Da Xue Sheng’ (大学生) my sister always said. Sarcastic remarks about 大学生 I have heard a lot. These are stabbing wounds. How many people can understand the plight of me.

Friends
What are friends? What are family? Trust. Who can we TRUST? ONLY GOD can we trust. Who are my friend(s)?

In God We Trust

On Friday, 25th July 2008, the children went to church for Reconciliation Service. It was drizzling and we walked instead of cycling. Despite the floor being wet, we still met Puma by SURPRISE. We were wondering,”Do you think my friend would be here?”

We were so happy that Puma cat was at the pavement, the place where I had met him on the day Gregory Yong died…. the same place. But on this evening, Puma was lying on the floor. I did not take a photo of him, but said to him,”Hi Puma, you must wait for me hor, later see you again, after church ok?” These are pictures of Puma, my faithful friend, heavenly friend, taken after Church.

Everything is fated! Now my eyes are opened. For the first time, I ‘discovered’ Tengah Air Base Crest Badge (just now when I posted about Special Number 11, mentioning about the two friends of Richard who died in a car accident several years back.)

I was checking for the correct name of the airbase and I was so surprised to find out the Facts about Tengah Airbase — Tengah Air Base is the most important airfield of the Republic of Singapore Air Force. It is home to the RSAF’s F-16 Fighting Falcons, E-2C Hawkeyes and a large number of UAVs. The air base goes by the motto of “Always Vigilant”. Prior to Singapore’s independence, it was an Royal Air Force station known as RAF Tengah. RAF Tengah was commissioned in 1939. It was renamed Tengah Air Base (TAB) in 1971 when it was handed over to the Singapore Air Defence Command (SADC). And from 1971 to 1976, under the Five Power Defence Arrangement, Tengah housed British, Australian and New Zealand forces.

Tengah Air Base (TAB) Crest Badge with Motto: Always Vigilant

Tengah’s motto, Always Vigilant, supports its main motif, a chess board Black Knight piece symbolic of the aircraft’s operational readiness in Tengah.

The sword represents war’s heraldic sword of destruction, while the state is depicted by the castle.

Constructed in 1932 by the British to give air cover to the naval base in Sembawang and commissioned RAF Tengah in 1939, the Air Base was constantly improved upon to prepare it for the increasingly sophisticated aircraft that was coming in.

These are the rest of the badges that Richard has. It is now my possession!

140 Squadron: Stand Firm In Defence : Set up in 1970, the squadron’s motto, Stand Firm In Defence, reflects the bird of prey they were named after. The Osprey symbolises strength, reliability, enviable powers of flight and control of the elements. The F16s in 140 Squadron are primarily responsible for Air Defence, Fighter Sweep and Escort and Counter Air Operations/Strategic Interdiction/Maritime Air Operations.

145 Squadron: Swift and Valiant — The squadron motif depicts a valiant hornet in an attack posture to deter potential agressors. The yellow and black strips represent speed and agility. Its blazed-green eyes and forward arching sting epitomise its readiness to strike in swift response to defend its nest, at day or night.

Established on 1st april 1984 in Tengah air base, the squadron first started flying the A4 Skyhawks. In 1992, 145 squadron was the first squadron to fly the indigenously developed A4-SUs.

The professionalism and operational readiness of the crew in 145 squadron were exemplified through the achievement of numerous awards which included the coveted best fighter squadron in 1998 and 2000, and RSAF hotshot competitions.

After nearly 2 decades the squadron ended its operations on the 30th Apr 2003 to prepare for the relocation and operation of the new F-16D BLK 52+ in CAB ( EAST).

On the 3rd Jul 2004, 145 squadron began operations from Changi air base (East) with the induction of the F-16D BLK 52+, the latest in the RSAF’s inventory.

The F-16D+ is equipped with state-of-the-art Conformal Fuel Tanks, an enhanced radar with greater detection range and improved mapping capabilities, and an improved targeting pod, which will enable the squadron to conduct precision day and night operations at a greater combat range and duration.

145 squadron is unique in the RSAF as all the aircraft are tandem seats and every mission is flown with a Pilot and WSO(FTR). This new concept of operations allows the squadron to take on even more complex and demanding missions.

Air Logistics Squadron (ALS): Strive To Resolve - The Air Logistics Squadron services, maintains and repairs on-ground systems required for air operations. Tengah’s ALS motif consists of a woodpecker pecking the worms out of a tree. Like the woodpecker, the ALS detects the ‘worms’ and ferrets them out. The squadron’s motto is Strive to Resolve.

A4SU Super Skyhawks

The RSAF aims to be among the best. To be a First Class Air Force, our people must also be among the best Air Force professionals in the world. To this end, the RSAF will strive…

* To achieve mission excellence in all aspects of operations both in peace and in war. We will fight as an integrated force with a broad spectrum of capabilities to achieve the SAF’s mission.
* To be a First Class learning organisation. We will develop our most important resource, our people, to their fullest potential through challenging and rewarding careers.
* To be best-trained. We will adopt a global training outlook to achieve professional excellence and combat readiness, whilst ensuring zero accidents.
* To achieve superior logistics. We will be agile and focused, ensuring mission effectiveness and operational success through speed and sustainment.
* To exploit leading edge technology. We will leverage on enabling technologies as force multipliers to hone the RSAF’s fighting edge.

Written 30th July 2008

Numbers are even so ‘holy’. The number 11, the number 3, the number 7, the number 8, the number 9, the number 0, the number 1, and the number 4, almost all the numbers are so special. But yet, among all these numbers, 11, eleven is ‘my number, was ‘my number’…

This is really the secret of the secret, the secret seed growing unknowingly and the secret fruit blossoming unknowingly….

I was so confused, I was so ‘lost’, so ‘lost’ of confidence for once. Never had I being this ‘lost’. I have always been full of confidence, full of courage, but I was ’scared’, ‘no confidence’, given such a big task….

Nevertheless, I would still continue, I must continue, somehow, it must continue…

Sakae Sushi, Woodlands, Causeway Point, Level 7

The children wanted to eat Soft Shell Crab. They love Sushi. They wanted to eat Sushi on this day, 27th July 2008, Sunday. We were given this seat. After ordering, I happened to see this seat number, 11. I was astonished. How HOLY numbers are. How HOLY is the name of the LORD, the creator of this world.

Mysterious Number 11… November Rain

John 11:25 — I am the resurrection and the life.

This numbers are my secret. It is birthdays, the meaning of birthdays, the meaning of words, the meaning of life and everything, everything everything…. it is so hard to say….

Banquet: Stall 11, Raffles Yong Tau Fu
This is Banquet, the food court which we like to go. At Banquet, we always frequent a few stall. This one, Yong Tau Fu is my favourite and I saw it was Stall 11, Raffles. This is all destiny…..

One day, one ‘fateful day’, on 11.11.(1993 - not sure the year. Ask Richard and he said is 1993, but cannot confirm. He ‘everything don’t know one’…) or 11 November. How can I forget this day, so special number, so easy to remember, and two friends, two male, two air force personnel died on this day! Their car skidded on this rainy day, when they were driving back to Tengah Airbase, to return to their barrack. I never even seen or go into a barrack before, don’t know how it looks like. Anyway, it was Richard’s friends and he should know better. He was lucky not to be with them that day…

I remembered what Richard had told me… Before his death, YWL returned his computer magazines to him. We were at Bukit Timah Plaza/Shopping centre (very confusing, always mixed up the two). Bukit Timah is also district 11, and I dreamed of it. Over here, many things happened also…. names and including surnames and numbers are indeed HOLY….

written on 30th July 2008

This is one of the white crane which I took a picture of. There were so many white cranes on the field, the usual place where we always cycled… the slope we cycled and the place we meet Puma, the place I fell down (to shun from the hanging worm), and the place where I saw the frog….. this block of flat here is also the flat which I had ‘dealt’ with years back when I was in property. This is all destiny…. this is the ’sacred’ place.

26th July 2008: white cranes and mynas on the field, began to fly about when I was taking photographs

In this rare found grassland, rare ‘open field’, precious piece of land in Singapore, first time, first time I saw white cranes, not one, not two, but many, MANY white cranes. The previous week, 19th July, after church, on this same piece of land, we saw so many birds flying and some birds flying to the Rain Tree, all flying so happily. So amazing scene…

Just as I was taking pictures, a white crane flew from the field, away from the rest. It was such a beautiful scene. The bird flying in front of me, flipping its wings, the bird in flight. It was so nice. It flew from the direction of East to West, from my right to the left, flying across the road. I was so filled with awe and wonder!

It’s Grace I found. This is Grace, another Gift from God! I am so touch, my life is full of blessings, blessings by God. God loves me so much…… Thank You Jesus, Thank You God.

What is Grace?
I know Grace as people’s names. I come across a few ‘Grace’. They are my ex-tenants, my husband’s collegues and they are still my friends. But I never know the meaning of grace.

I know of the song ‘Amazing Grace’, and I love the song. Ricsson also asked me for the meaning of Grace. I could not answer him. But now, I think I can sense it….. it is really Amazing Grace, a gift from God.

Taken from the Catechism of the Catholic Church, Grace is:

Grace is favour, the free and undeserved help that God gives us to respond to his call to become children of God, adoptive sons, partakers of the divine nature and of eternal life.

Grace is a participation in the life of God. It introduces us into the intimacy of Trinitarian life: by Baptism, the Christian participates in the grace of Christ, the Head of his Body.

The Grace of Christ is the gratuitous gift that God makes to us of his own life, infused by the Holy Spirit into our soul to heal it of sin and to santify it. It is the sanctifying or deifying grace received in Baptism. It is in us the source of the work of sanctification:

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself.

Grace is first and foremost the gift of the Spirit who justifies and sanctifies us. The preparation of man for the reception of grace is already a work of grace.

Indeed we also work, but we are only collaborating with God who works, for his mercy has gone before us. It has gone before us so that we may be healed, and follows us so that once healed, we may be given life; it goes before us so that we may be called, and follows us so that we may be glorified; it goes before us so that we may live devoutly, and follows us so that we may always live with God: for without him we can do nothing.

written on 30 July 2008

Today is another special day. This four o’clock plant flowered, one beautiful orange flower! But I want to confess. This four 0′clock flower plant is not my plant. It was ’stolen’ from Fu Shan Garden…. I had ’stolen’ numerous plants, some with roots, some with no roots. No roots, it would naturally died, unless the plant can be propagated by stem. As for these four o’clock flower plant, no roots surely die! But this small four o’clock plant which I had ’stolen’, one was with roots and one without. Surprisingly, first time, really first time. Even without roots, BOTH plants SURVIVED, and it was exactly one week, now it flowered…

Energy cannot be destroyed. Energy is passed on from one person to another, from one source to another. This is what I learn in Physics. Physics, something which I had never ‘touched’ since Secondary School….

It was Richard’s birthday yesterday, 25th July. It was the death of Randy Paush on this day as well!

Richard’s Birthday
On this day, 25th July, we went to church — have to arrive there by 7.30pm. The children have to attend Reconciliation Service. On the way to church, we met Puma Cat. Clara stroked Puma, and we continued our journey to the church.

Whenever we walked past the slope, we would now always guess whether Puma would be there a not. That night, Clara again asked,”Do you think your friend would be there?”

I said,”Don’t know.”

Clara said,”Yes.”

True enough, we saw Puma waiting in front of us later on.

Took a quick picture of Puma on the way to church, blurred…

“Te Pei” (teochew, meaning the sky turned, everything turned, everything changed)

After church, Puma was waiting for us on the grass, on the right side of the pavement. I asked the children to take a picture with Puma. The children stood behind Puma. Now, Puma rolled over, with a purr. How amazing it was.

The New and Everlasting Covenant
Puma cat is my faithful friend. Though we never met before, but we are all creation of God. He ‘knows’ me and I ‘know’ him…

Questions are the answers!
This is a gift which even Money cannot buy. A ‘gift’ which is between me and God….. ‘Blessed’ is he or ‘blessed’ is me? Our God is a humourous God!

written on 30 July 2008

Carrying the cross is not easy. Who says it is easy to be a Christian? Nothing is easy in this world. I am so surprised, so touched. How awesome, how miraculous and how wonderful the creation of this world. The most miraculous of all, the transformation in me. I cannot believe what I wrote also.

Is this a fair world? I don’t know, but I believe Justice Shall Prevail in this world. All it takes is time. Money is not a measure of wealth, a rich life may not be a person who are rich. A person who are rich may not have a rich life. Richard Palace wants to have wealth, but I want to have a rich life. He is my life, my inspiration. God gifted him to me. Destiny brought us back after we were separated. He is meant for me. He is the story of my life — the life of a mediocre, yearning for Peace and Justice. The life of a mediocre who wants to find real meaning of success in life and not just a life full of material wealth.

For these, I am sure everything is working. I may see “Bad” or “Failure” or am “broken”, but things happened for no reasons. Something always come to my mind instantaneously. They are all miracles of the Holy Spirit. Archbishop Gregory Yong Sooi Ngean put his hands on my head. I shall receive the Holy Spirit. What is Holy Spirit? I did not know what is soul, what is Spirit and what is Ghost! I was ‘blank’, merely filling with awe and excitement over the Sacrament of Confirmation. But now, I understand. Am I right or am I wrong for what I believe? Up to now, I am quite sure my logic is working real and fine.

At Confirmation, we learn the implications of our new life in the Holy Spirit:

All powerful God, Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,
by water and the Holy Spirit
you freed your sons and daughters from sin
And gave them new life.
Send your Holy Spirit upon them
to be their helper and guide.
Give them the spirit of wisdom and understanding,
the spirit of right judgment and courage,
the spirit of knowledge and reverence.
Fill them with the spirit of wonder and awe in your presence.

They Died That We Might Live.
First, it was Gregory Yong, next I saw Dr Ong Chit Chung and now it was Randy Pausch (23 Oct 1960 - 25 July 2008). Randy Pausch was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer on September 2006. He died of complication of pancreatic cancer. In the year 1988-1997, he taught at University of Virginia. He was an award-winning teacher and researcher.

Randy Pausch Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams

“Randy’s lecture has become a phenomenon, celebrating the dreams we all strive to still make realities…”

They Died That We Might Live. This is especially so for one person whom I know, and this person is Jesus, the only person who died on the cross to save the people on earth. He knew everything that was to happen. He who had come down from heaven.

Life is a gamble
“We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.” ~ Randy Pausch

Randy Pausch said,”Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted. Most of what we learn, we learn indirectly or by ‘head fake’.” He also mention about Imagineering, how to put engineers and artist together and so on.

He also said,”We learn from our Students.” This is definitely true also.

written on 30 July 2008